I stole this from an email letter from Christopher Kimball, host of a cooking show on PBS.
A motorist stopped his car on the outskirts of town and asked directions from an elderly farmer working in a field with a horse-drawn plow. The farmer appeared to be in his late sixties, and the stranger was impressed with the vigor with which he tackled his chores.
“Aren’t you a little old to be doing heavy work like this?” he asked.
“Ain’t so bad,” the farmer replied. “My pa is an awful big help.”
“Your father is alive?”
“Yup. That’s him up by the barn there, pitching manure.”
The stranger spotted the old gentleman in the distance. “But that’s amazing. How old is he, anyway?”
“I can’t believe it. A man his age ought not to be exerting himself like that.”
“Well, ordinarily Grandpa is around to help.”
“You have a grandfather? Good heavens, how old would he be?”
“Hundred and three.”
“This is astonishing. Where is he now?”
“On his honeymoon.”
“You mean to tell me that he just got married? Why on earth would a man his age want to do that?”
A woman awakes during the night to find that her husband was not in their bed. She puts on her robe and goes downstairs to look for him. She finds him sitting at the kitchen table with a hot cup of coffee in front of him. He appears to be in deep thought, just staring at the wall, and then she watches as he wipes a tear from his eye and takes a sip of this coffee.
“What’s the matter, dear?” She whispers as she steps into the room, “Why are you down here at this time of night?”
The husband looks up from is coffee, “Do you remember 20 years ago when we were dating, and you were only 16?” he asks solemnly. The wife is touched to tears thinking that her husband is so caring and sensitive. “Yes I do,” she
The husband paused. The words were not coming easily. “Do you remember when your father caught us in the back seat of my car making love?” “Yes, I remember,” said the wife, lowering herself into a chair beside him.
The husband continued. “Do you remember when he said, ‘Either you marry my daughter, or I will send you to jail for 20 years?” “I remember that too” she replied softly. He wiped another tear from his cheek and said… “I would have gotten out today.”